A Spoonful of "You Don't Always Get What You Want, But Sometimes You Find Out You Don't Want What You Thought You Wanted" and the Problems That Follow That Realization

When I got back from Paris I was set on having a boyfriend. It was just going to happen for me. I even joked about having a one-month plan and then was serious about it. I've always been pretty sociable, but never very flirty with loads of guys, but I figured it was time for that to change.

See, I like where I'm at in my life. I have my major figured out with what I want to do for Grad school and I'm living the way I should be, making changes every day, and I felt ready for a relationship to happen. Particularly, I thought I wanted a relationship with a certain guy. Heck, I had a crush on him forever ago and so when things started to look different, I figured it was time to go for it.

Your own tenacity in a relationship can get you a lot of things. As examples, more physical proximity, more face-time, admittance of feelings/attraction, but it doesn't give you a blank check for what you want. That's why the fact that he doesn't want a serious relationship isn't life-crushing, it's just life. Sometimes you get to make the mistakes before you have the realization, and sometimes you don't.

So to set the record straight, I am single. And I wish I didn't have to explain myself to this boy or to other people, because I'm not sure how to do so. Life situations (dilemma's?) always seem to come at the busiest times in my life. Can anybody say finals week? Luckily I only have two finals and one essay to write, but that's pretty intense considering my work and social life. I love how crazy life is and how you find out you don't really know nothing every day.